Advice on how I (36M) can survive a visit from my parents (60s M&F)

Hopefully this fits this sub. I live an 8 hour flight from my parents, and they have come to visit me for the first time since COVID. However, I'm a very independent person, and having to spend every waking hour with them is driving me insane. In particular is car rides - my Dad insists on sitting in the front seat, and proceeds to fidget constantly and breathe loudly (due to COPD and asthma). This is completely unintentional on his part (as in, he does not realise he is doing it), and for some reason this just triggers a response from me. It's like nails on a chalkboard, and makes the drive excruciating.
I've managed to arrange a day off from them this week, but between now and then I have to survive a 3 day roadtrip with several hours of driving each way. This reaction of mine is entirely on my end, and there's nothing to confront my Dad about ("hey Dad, can you not breathe as loudly as you do?" Is not exactly going to work). Does anyone have any tips how I can manage my annoyances without having a breakdown which would sour their visit for them?

For some background relevance, my relationship with my parents is OK, not terrible but not super close either (I left my home country when I was 21 and have never wished to move back, to the slight disappointment of my parents). I have been suffering from mental health issues for the past 2 years, but I am slowly improving and talking to a therapist regularly. My parents know this, but don't want to talk about it (they're old and British - that's just the way things work there). I also have no SO to help out with the 'burden'.
I feel like this is a ridiculous thing to ask in this sub, but I would like to maintain my relationship as it is with my parents, and at this rate either I'm going to snap at my Dad for what are pretty minor things, or going to have an anxiety attack bought on by the thought of having to suffer through another several hour car journey. In particular I'm hoping for any healthy coping mechanisms when I'm driving and find myself starting to get annoyed but cannot remove myself from that situation.
Thanks in advance for any advice.
TL:DR: Parents visiting, some aspects of how they exist are excruciatingly annoying to me, need advice on how to survive another week with then.

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How, where and when do you tell a guy that you are not looking for anything serious?

Guess the title says it all, I(F29) don’t know how and when to tell someone that you would like your relationship to be only casual. I came out of a serious relationship in July and I am just not ready to commit to a new person yet. I also enjoy the freedom that comes with being single and lastly, I haven’t fully healed from the last relationship.

Last week though, I hooked up with a new coworker (M25) at an office party (just lots of kissing, nothing more) and it was kind of said between the lines that we would do more than that at the next party, which is about a week from now (office parties are a big thing where I work). We haven’t had any kind of talk about what we each are/are not looking for, but I just want to make it clear where I stand without ruining the fun and flirty vibe. When and where is the best time to tell him? And how should I do it without making it sound l assume he is interested in something serious?

TLDR: I don’t how and when to tell a guy that I am not insterested in something serious

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My boyfriend (22M) and I (23F) had a fight and he is ignoring me. Any advice?

I (23F) had a big fight with my bf (22M) on Tuesday. I’m going to give you a little background: we’ve been together for 2 years and now I’m in the process of changing a lot of things in my life, first of all my studies... bc I’m not happy with what i’m doing and doesn’t make me proud. Let’s say he isn’t very happy about that. He is a very busy guy he works a full time job and he has decided to attend night school to finally get his high school diploma. Nothing makes me more happy and proud. So when Tuesday he called me telling me he had be chosen to do something about work related, I was happy for him but i was concerned. I told him that if we try to do a lot of things simultaneously, we end up doing nothing. And oh my god, I released hell on Earth. He said: I’m not like you, that I can’t finish anything... he was referring to collage. He said that on purpose just to hurt me. We haven’t spoken since. Yesterday I texted him and called him, he said that he would call me back. He didn’t.

So you know what I’m going to do? I’m going to put my most beautiful dress, put some makeup on and hang out with my friends. I’m not stay here at home crying, and waiting for some child to grow up. I’m not going to cry today, maybe tomorrow but not today.

It’s going to be his bday in few days what should I do? I mean I have his gift plus I planned for him a surprise. Plus, I think we should confront each other.

TL;DR; : My boyfriend doesn’t want to talk to me, but I need to get to the bottom of it.

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Is my [M/24] friend [F/21] being friendly or something more?

I’ve met up with her a few times before leaving the country and both times, she’s been very touchy (of course I reciprocate back appropriately). Touchy in the sense that she puts her hands on my chest, gets close to me, holds hands or prolongs the touch.

She invited me over for lunch and then said “can you help me with my luggage on my bed”. Didn’t make anything of it but we chilled in her room and got close (made no move)

Next time I seen her we had wine and then went out to the town while basically holding hands the entire time (we were being friendly and joking around and what not). We end up going back to her place and just kinda spooned (ngl I was being touchy but she was cool with it clearly) — again no move made cause I suck with signs

We call/FT here and there and have actually become close friends. We joke about sexual things here and there of course, one time we FT’d and she straight up told me she’s not wearing a bra, or I’d be making jokes about “taking long”, or she’d joke about her ass and I’d go along with it of course

Can someone explain to me what’s going on?

——-

TL;DR: don’t know if my friend is being friendly or likes me or any of the above

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my ex and I are thinking about getting back together. should he tell me his indiscretions?

My ex (27m) and I (39f) are seriously thinking about getting back together. There were some serious trust violations on his part but if we do get back together I'm putting great emphasis on trust building. I've read that the first part of rebuilding trust is putting everything out in the open. I also believe this will help me start to trust him more, as he had a habit of keeping things from me when we were together.

I believe he should tell me everything that happened while we weren't together. I already told him everything, for the most part when it happened or soon after. He doesn't want to tell me anything (hes told me about a couple of girls that were flirting with him but wont answer any of my questions or tell me anything else. He says its none of my business and won't affect our relationship. I told him i needed a show of good faith that he won't keep things from me in the future.

Another thing to note is that before he told me about the girls flirting with him he told me some bu))$h1t story (I guess to try to shut me up) but i saw right through it and he finally admitted those couple things.

What do you all think? I think that if we weren't planning on getting back together then no, it would be none of my business. But we are planning to be together and I feel like if he does this it will start to establish trust.

Tl:dr: ex and I are considering reconciliation but he won't tell me what he did when we broke up

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Getting over best friend crush

For the past two years I’ve (25M) been hanging out / started a deep friendship with a guy (27M). We have a lot in common, we have a great time and have good chemistry.

Very soon in our friendship we started hanging out a lot, we slept over and cuddled and overall I always felt that there was something else that I was feeling and I had the gut instinct that it was reciprocated.

Last year I came clean to him and told him I had romantic feelings towards him, he said he wasn’t ready for that conversation so I understood and shelved that for a while and stayed his friend.

A few months ago, after having a very deep conversation I confessed to him again that my feelings had not dissipated and I still liked him romantically. This time we did talk and he told me that he felt the same, that me being with him makes him a better person, that he also thinks we have a lot in common and that he wants to keep me forever in his life.

I ask him if he would be interested in going out on a date to try and see how we feel (we hang out alone but not in a date setting) and he agrees. When the date comes he acts distant, doesn’t want to answer any questions about our romantic feelings and overall feels cold. He ends up telling me that he doesn’t wanna hurt me because all his last relationships have ended because of his issues and basically told me that the minute I left his house the day we talked he realized he is not ready for a relationship.

I felt hurt but I understood. You can’t force anyone to love you. We hung out less because we got busy but still talked everyday. My romantic feelings are still there but I know I can’t act on them.

A few days ago we had another conversation about issues with his family and the future. He also told me that he started going out with / dating someone (I suspected it since he was acting weird) and that he was happy and liked the guy and wanted to let me know because he knew how I felt.

I said i’m okay because I can’t change his mind or make him like me and I appreciate him telling me, which is true. But it’s also true that I feel used or lied to. Why didn’t he tell me before that it was not that he wasn’t ready for a relationship but just that he didn’t want one with me?

I feel that I need to distance myself because seeing him post things with that guy makes me feel weird (so I don’t know if I would feel comfortable hanging out in a group setting with him). Don’t mistake me, I am happy for him because he deserves joy. But I also deserve peace.

Is it unfair that I want to distance myself from him? I still love him as a friend and I know that I don’t want a romantic relationship with him because this whole thing has hurt me deeply.

I just want to heal without finishing a friendship that makes me feel good (in the friend part, that is) Any advice?

TL;DR : Best friend / crush / guy I like romantically has told me he liked me but isn’t ready for a relationship. He started dating someone and I feel hurt. How can I distance without ending our friendship?

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I [25M] messed up with a good girl [22F]

OK, so I [25] met this girl [22] three months ago and the spark was there instantly. I invited her for a date afterwards and it was a great summer, we clicked and could talk about anything. I could see that she’s head over heels into me. First, I was very attentive but after some time I started to have these moments on our dates when I just fell silent (I was still processing my family loss, I guess, I am better now) and she noticed this. At the end of August, she started studying (she’s a nurse and worked at hospital where my grandpa died in August, she knew him) so school and work both got into way. She had less time and we didn’t see each other for almost two weeks. This is where I fucked up royally. I got drunk one night (couldn’t bear memories of grandpa) and kinda blamed her for not wanting to see me over text (she was on the night shift…) and that she has time for her friends (some of them male which I ofc didn’t forget to mention..) and not me. I must mention that after grandpa’s death I was under and I saw everything negatively and was paranoid, but that’s no excuse for this shit I pulled ofc.

She said that I should have say something earlier about me wanting to see her and that she’s seriously disappointed, didn’t expect this shit from me. She also mentioned that she noticed me being distrait and “not there” sometimes on our dates and that she doesn’t even know if I want her. Next morning I explained and apologized profusely. Man, I know it was short term relationship but I can’t stop blaming myself, because I am not like this, I get that she had important things to do, I would never do that again, especially now when I kinda processed my family loss and doing better. We sporadically made contact since then, sometimes it was her, sometimes me, she said she needed time to process this and that she was disappointed by what happened. Our last conversation a week ago was me asking her if she wants to talk in person. She replied yes, I asked when, she texted wait a minute and didn’t get back to me at all. I texted next day if she’s ok and she just texted “Yes 😂”.

Sorry, this post is a mess, I just poured all my thoughts here. I know I fucked up badly and created this image of me being needy and childish but I was just down mentally. Is there a chance to fix this? Why did she agree to meet, then kinda ghosted me when I specifically said in that text that I will respect if she doesn’t want to see me again.

I know, I know, there are millions of women in the world. But I want to know if there’s a chance here, maybe if I kinda disappear? And sorry, English is not my first language.

tl;dr: I acted needy and childish with a girl because I had issues and now I miss her so much. Is there a chance to fix this? I feel guilty every day.

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