i (19F) found a dating app on my boyfriends (21M) phone

i (19F) and my boyfriend (21M) have been going out for almost 6 months now and i wanted to ask advice. after our first month of dating while my boyfriend was on his phone i noticed on the screen a dating app, this wasnt too shocking to me as we met on a dating app ourselves and even tho it made me a little uneasy i knew that we hadnt been together that long and wernt too serious at the time so i forgot about it. fast forward to last night while we were out these guys came up to us asking us to do that tiktok loyalty test thing were we go through eachothers phones. my boyfriend gave me his phone with no hesitation. and while i looked at the screen i saw that the same dating app was there. i didnt say anything and we continued until the guys left and we joked about how random it was. but im still thinking about why he still has the dating app after 6 months. we are so close and i genuinely love him so much and belive he loves me too, i just dont know how to talk to him about how it makes me uncomfortable. first off i in no way think that he is cheating or being unfaithfull, but how do i bring up this conversation about the app and calm down my mind. thankyou

TLDR: found dating app on my boyfriends phone after 6 months and want to talk about it to him.

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I (F28) broke up with my boyfriend (M27) because he broke a promise. Am I being unreasonable?

TL;DR Boyfriend attacked me while he was drunk. I took him back because he promised to stop drinking. He drank for the first time in months, so I broke up with him. Am I being unreasonable because he has improved in certain respects?

For context, my ex and I always had a rocky relationship. One of those ones where “when it’s good, it’s really good. When it’s bad, it’s really bad”. I’m talking arguments that resulted in terrible name calling, threats to break up, even having the police called.

Summer of last year, I started a new job. He expressed to me, as I began, that he was feeling insecure about me cheating with my new colleagues. I did everything I could to reassure him, but 2 weeks into my new job, I went out for after work drinks with my colleagues. When I returned home, he was extremely drunk and accused me of cheating from the moment I arrived. After a big back and forth, he ended up attacking me. I immediately called the police and he was taken away. This resulted in him legally not being allowed to talk to me or see me for a month. But that didn’t stop him. He begged and made so many promises, the biggest one being that he’d stop drinking forever. We both agreed that if he broke that promise, it’d be over. I was in a really vulnerable state at that point, so despite what he did to me, I took him back on his promises.

Fast forward to today and he has made many improvements and has become a better partner in most respects. However, I left the country for a few days for a short trip and one night, he ended up getting black out drunk, which I found out through his texts and calls to me. In that moment, I stuck to the deal and said we were over. He battled hard and said he made a mistake and promised that this time, he’d really stop because he can NOW really see the damage his drinking would cause.

With everything in the past and the broken promise, I put my foot down. But still, I can’t help but wonder if I’m being unreasonable because it was one slip up out of all the other improvements that were made? Will he really be better and stick to his promise this time? Or have I made the right decision?

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I took custody of the dog in an ugly breakup. Was I wrong for what I did?

My ex and I got a golden retriever puppy together in the middle of Covid. It was perfect timing because I was working from home so I could keep an eye on her, take her out frequently, and work on training. I taught her everything she knows.

I would say I was her primary caregiver, and my name was on all of the receipts and her vet paperwork. This is important.

When we broke up he made it clear that he thought splitting custody would be the best. He wanted do two weeks on/two weeks off.

I was planning on moving back home post breakup, which would make it a 3 hour drive between us. I was simply not interested in continuing to have him in my life for the next ten years. The breakup was messy and not on good terms at all.

He told me that if I didn’t want to split custody that he would then be taking the dog solely. Things were getting ugly at home and we were still living together while I was looking for a new apartment. We were beginning to hate eachother.

So basically I realized the only way I could keep the dog is to basically just go ahead and take her. So I left one day while he was at work. He came home and we were both gone. I feel cruel for the way I did it…

I feel horrible about how this all went down but I felt like I had no other choice. My ex was devastated. His mother called me and said she had never seen him so upset, that he was sobbing. He promised me he was going to sue me for custody, but I think he realized he had no grounds and eventually texted me to let me know that he wouldn’t be suing me, and that the dog is mine now, best of luck, etc.

Has anyone been in a similar situation? The guilt of everything is eating me alive, but I feel I had no other choice. I also worry about how my dog is dealing with this, if she misses him too. I’d like to hear some of your experiences with dog custody issues. Thanks in advance!

TL:DR One day I just up and left with the dog and moved to another state. My ex is devastated and wanted to split custody. Was I wrong for what I did?

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The Guy (39,M) I (30,F) Like Is Sponsoring The Mother Of His Children

I (30,F) really like this guy (39,M) I met online but know I should not be subjecting myself to this world of chaos. We have been dating for about a year give or take.

He’s 39, has two children, and lives at home with his aging parents. In addition, the mother of his children is living with them as well, along with the two children. She isn’t a citizen of the country and doesn’t work so he feels obligated to support her for the sake of the children. According to him, she’s disrespectful, lazy and unappreciative to him and his family. He says their relationship has been over for a while, that he is not attracted to her and does not want a relationship with her. They are not together and both date other people.

Due to the fact that she is not a citizen, he’s in the process of legally sponsoring her, to ensure she can remain in their children’s lives, as they have autism and have grown very attached to their mother. The mother of his children does have family in the country but he says he does not want her living with them and risk having his children growing up in a bad neighborhood considering she’d have the children full-time while he works.

I really do like him, but know and understand I’m getting the really short end of the stick and this probably isn’t going to work out long-term. I can’t go over his house, won’t be able to get married or have children of my own with him. It absolutely sucks, because when we’re together, we have such a great time and spend so much time laughing with one another. But ultimately the cons outweigh the pros. I should also mention he’s been to jail in his earlier days and works, but money is always tight. Him having a criminal record does not make it easy for him to secure a job that pays more, which means I’m always paying for things. It doesn’t really bother me only because I’ve never been with a man who has or could provide for me, so I’m used to spending a lot money while dating.

Truthfully, a part of me thinks I may like him out of desperation and loneliness (I’ve been dating for a while with no success) but also has genuine interest in him, enjoys spending time with him and remains hopeful, stupidly. He says he loves me and wants to be with me, but I don’t know. It’s probably in my best interest to remain friends and seek to date other people. I just feel a little stuck. Please don’t be mean to me. I’m obviously a little delusional and wear my heart on my sleeve lol.

For some reason, I equate sponsoring her with marrying her in my mind, because he’d be legally responsible for her for 10 years according to his lawyer. I even told him he might as well marry her.

TL;DR : The guy I like, is legally sponsoring the mother of his children but says he loves and wants to be with me.

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I (38M) dont wish to socialise with my dad (57M)

Never had a great relationship growing up, he has never been one for talking much and was quite strict as we grew up, were never really that close.

I am 38, he is 57, the relationship has been 38 years obviously.

Fast forward many years and i now have a daughter which is his granddaughter. For context he lives 5 minutes down the road and is of fine health, still works full time and has nothing else really going on.

He makes literally zero effort with his granddaughter, he will text once a month/2 months to catch up BUT always expects me to take my daughter to his.

When i get there he basically doesent talk, doesent interact with her and usually seems in a hurry to be going out somewhere for shopping or something.

For christmas he got me and my daughter presents and decided to just exclude my partner for some reason (who i have been with for 15 years). Then it was my partners birthday and she didnt get a text or anything, just literally zero effort.

He has since contacted me to go out for a few hours to 'catch up' one day but i dont think i want to make the effort given he makes zero effort with the 2 most important people in my life.

TLDR:

Do i make the effort to go and socialise with my dad given he makes zero effort with the 2 closest people to me including his own granddaughter?

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I (28f) found out the my partner (29m) was still in a relationship with his wife when we started dating. Is there a chance we can rebuild the trust?

Me and my boyfriend have been together about 8 months. The day after our first date he told me he was still married but separated and had a daughter. Things have been going really well, we are really loved up, love spending time with each other and things seemed perfect. However, I have had concerns that him and his ex hadn’t been separated as long as he said (he told me 7 months before meeting me). There were some signs, of them not having established a healthy co-parenting relationship.

Eventually after asking and questioning (which I am not proud of), he told me they had actually only separated 3 months before meeting me & was still living in the family home until meeting me. I was hurt, but began to move forward.

Fast forward to now when I am meeting his child, ex wanted to meet me first which I agreed. She then told me that they had separated after an event he went to, which I had met him before he went.

I didn’t tell her, as she believes we started dating after they split. And I didn’t want her to hurt the way I do because she doesn’t deserve it. I have told him I am most hurt he let me find out this way. He says the relationship was over a long time before, but he was stuck, he has tried to leave before but went back out of guilt. He says in his head they were split up.

We had just moved in together, and signed a tenancy together before I found this out.

I love this boy, but I don’t think I will ever trust him. Has anyone ever been in this position before? Can anyone help me see from his point of view?

TL;DR - boyfriend was still married when we started dating and let me find out the truth from his ex wife

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MIT Course Enhances Social Connection, Relationships, and Happiness - India Education Diary

MIT Course Enhances Social Connection, Relationships, and Happiness  India Education Diary

* This article was originally published here