Am I an asshole for having some kind of feelings for my EXs best friend after we broke up?

So some weeks ago my girlfriend of 6 years told me she had cheated on me which crushed me and we broke up. Our relationship sometimes felt like we were best friends who lived under the same roof so this is probably for the best. However during our relationship I have been very good friends with her friends and one of them to the point of me being able to be with her without my (ex)girlfriend (known that friend for about 6 years as well). I have always felt a good connection with her (friendly) and we are more similar than me and my ex. The last year of my relationship I have felt that it’s more fun hanging out with her then my then gf which I have questioned myself about.

So to the current moment. She has taken my side in all of this even though my gf and her has been friends since first years of school. We have talked on phone and been texting a bunch. She wants to meet when she’s home and talk and is also up for going for a drink sometime. I got invited to a new year’s party which my ex is not attending. She has even said she might cut the contact with her after what she did to me?

I have felt she might have liked me before but it was nothing we talked about. My ex also said that she is worried she liked me more but I told her we were just friends.

Do you think she might like me more than a friend?

Am I a total asshole for doing stuff with her that might lead to something more?

Otherwise me and my ex has had a really civilized breakup and talked a lot so not really any angry feelings. I am not doing this in any way to get back at her.

Might have had feelings for her more than a friend during our relationship but pushed it away because it’s wrong and I still loved my girlfriend.

Edit: Worried I’m just feeling this way because she has given me support during this shitty situation and genuinely cares about me.

TL;DR Broke up with my girlfriend of 6 years after she cheated on me and now I have been talking a lot to her best friend feeling it could lead to something more. Is this wrong?

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Song Joong-ki is in a relationship, according to his agency - Yahoo News

Song Joong-ki is in a relationship, according to his agency  Yahoo News

* This article was originally published here

Girlfriend's[19 F] acting all strange and new to me[M 20]

So about 3 weeks back, me and my girlfriend had a fight, kinda a big one where i was insensitive about her feelings, but i talked about it with her and solved it, but she kept her grudges and i was fine with it cause i can understand how she feels about it, but anyways fast forward to the last 2 days, and she's just been acting differently to me, in fact it feels more like she again has an issue with me, but she isn't clear about it, and like we haven't really talked over phone since that fight, we met but that was once and that's about it, when i talk about something, she ends it with an ohh, or just doesn't reply to it, fine, but it's not just that she even acts like the things I'm telling her are new and acts like we are new people, she recently went somewhere on a hike and i was asking about it cause i was genuinely interested about it, and she just said it was good and wasn't telling anything much about it, i was so hurt and i didn't even know how to tell it to her that i don't like the way she's treating me, i just wanna break down at this moment, i don't even have any friends that i can go talk to, she was literally the only one i had

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tl;dr girlfriends been acting like we are new friends and isn't really sharing things with me, i don't know how to talk to her about it

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Bf constantly refuses me for emotional and physical affection if I initiate

My(26F) bf(28M) and I have been on the rocks lately. We were lying in bed tonight, but he seemed a bit standoffish and quiet, so I asked him if everything was ok. He replied yes, although right off the bat seemed pretty annoyed. I asked again since it was pretty clear he was frustrated, but that made it even worse. Tbh I get how that can be annoying since I kept asking, so I tried to let it go. I then asked him for a hug, but he told me he didn’t feel like it...Those kinds of actions make me very unsure in our relationship. Whenever he initiates any form of contact I welcome it, but I always feel like it’s only on his terms. Whenever I try it’s met with rejection 99% of the time. Over time it makes me feel desperate and unwanted when I try to initiate. When I asked him why he didn’t want to hug, he told me I was only asking because I’m insecure and that I shouldn’t put my emotions on him. I’m always left second guessing myself and just don’t know what to do. I genuinely just wanted to feel held. Maybe I should have apologized for asking twice in hindsight. He’s always making these assumptions about me lately, so I’m left waiting only for him to initiate. I want to feel like I can be freely affectionate too, but to him it just seems like everything I do has a motive behind it or I can only wait for him to come to me.

TL;DR BF(28M) refuses me physical/emotional affection if I(26F) initiate

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My [19M] best friend [19F] has been too busy to hang out even once over the last four months

Me and my friend met in high school and have been really close ever since. We always hung out, knew every little bit of gossip about each others lives and I was practically an honorary part of her family. People would always say that we acted like twins or practically shared a brain cell. She was like a sister to me.

But for the last four months, whenever I ask if she’s free to hang out, she’s always “Busy”. I was fine with it at first, but it’s starting to get a tad weird. Apparently she’s been working a lot, but there’s no way in hell she’s been working for seven days a week every week for several months. I have other friends with pretty hectic work/college schedules that still make time to hang out with me whenever they can.

We rarely even text or call anymore. It’s like our friendship just vanished and I have no idea why. We’ve literally never had a proper fight (Other than friendly banter) and I’m not sure what I could’ve done. It’s honestly really hurting me to drift away from my best friend like this

Any advice on how to deal with this?

TLDR: My best friend has been to “busy” to hang out even one for several months. Don’t know if I did something wrong or not

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My friend is an abusive household over Christmas - what can I do to help?

TDLR: friend has to deal with emotionally abusive dad and feels like she can’t leave. How can I help as a long distance friend?

My friend and I are both 22 and attend university together. We’ve both gone home to our families for Christmas in different parts of the country - me being south her being north.

I’ve known she’s had trouble with her family, pretty much all her life, but it seems to be going particularly bad atm - she’s being calling me crying/texting everyday about her dad.

Behaviours include Dad talking about my friend behind her back, manipulating discussions between them to her mum, being generally angry over small things, refusing to accept apologies from her (even though he’s more in the wrong for being the adult), threatening her to not tell her friends about how he’s acting

Basically, shes not happy being at home at all and her mum isn’t really supporting her either - the mum leaves whenever they argue (which is more my friend defending herself against an angry shouty man) and wants her to take the high road so they can move on and enjoy Christmas.

My friend wants to go back to uni asap, but feels she cannot leave until the agreed date on Jan because she’s worried they’ll think she’s being dramatic, and the dad will just take it out on her mum.

As her friend I feel terrible I can’t do more to help. She doesn’t deserve the treatment she’s getting and even know I would just up and leave I can’t force her to do that.

Is there anything I can say or suggest to help my friend during this Christmas period?

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I know my friend’s (24F) boyfriend (25M) of 2 ½ years is considering breaking up with her. Do I tell her what I know?

A few years back my boyfriend and I introduced my good friend and his friend to each other. They got on very well and eventually entered a relationship together.

Almost 3 years on, my friend is very much in love and wants to move in and get married to her boyfriend. However, it has just come to light that the boyfriend is in debt because of a gambling problem which he has been hiding from her. This isn’t great at all as my friend believed they would soon have enough money to put a deposit on a house together. She also asked him if he even wanted to move in together, and he wasn’t sure.

She has been speaking to me about this and wants to help get her boyfriend out of debt and fix his gambling problem, but most of all she is very upset and confused as to why he isn’t sure about moving in together.

Now the part where this is tricky for me is that her boyfriend is very good friends with my boyfriend, and he has been speaking about this on the group chat with a few other friends. They keep this chat very light-hearted but one thing he said that stood out to me is; “I do love her, but I am not sure if I love her as much as I should”. He also expressed that he often finds her difficult to be with but said that he can’t break up with her now because its Christmas and her Birthday soon.

My friend does have anger problems and can snap easily if provoked. She could also be considered controlling as well and I get the impression that her boyfriend feels that all she does is complain at him. Her family are verbally aggressive toward one another, so I think this is where she gets it from. I also know she is unhappy with her current situation and feels that moving out into her own place will help.

Her boyfriend keeps very quiet and emotionless about his personal problems which makes this difficult. Having a gambling addiction is sure to impact his mental health. He hasn’t even spoken to his best friends about his problem.

I don’t want to add fuel to the fire, so I am keen for them to work it out. My boyfriend suggested that we sit down with the and ‘mediate’ as they are terrible at communicating, but I think that is a little embarrassing for us all!

I don’t want to ruin my friends Christmas or birthday in a few weeks’ time, although I know this has its pros and cons. I also don’t want to get involved with limited information and cause conflict that they may have been able to resolve together. I really think he should just take some responsibility for his life and tell my friend how he feels as she has no idea at all!

Do you think I should mind my business?

TL;DR! I know my friend’s (24F) boyfriend (25M) of 2 ½ years is considering breaking up with her but doesn’t want to deal wit it until after her birthday next year. I don’t know whether to let them sort it between themselves or tell my friend what I know.

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* This article was originally published here