My fiancé and I have been together for five years, and just got engaged a couple of months ago. Our relationship has been kind of rocky mainly due to immaturity and communication issues, but this past year has been our best yet. He has become so much more loving and patient and willing to do the things he never was willing to in the past.
A couple of nights ago, (Valentine’s Day) after wrapping up a great night spent celebrating, we started talking before bed. Since getting engaged, we’ve been talking a lot about having kids, how we will raise them, etc. I can’t exactly remember how we got on the specific subject, but I said something about wanting to make sure that if we ever have a son that he’s respectful towards women. In response, he “joked” that if his teenaged son ever said something like “women are b!tches,” he’d high-five him and agree with him.
I got mad and then he tried to say he was just joking around and that I should’ve known he wasn’t being serious. I told him that it’s a serious subject to me, especially given the fact that many male members of his family display a lot of sexism. His father and cousins frequently say stupid, sexist things. My fiancé also did earlier in our relationship which caused issues between us so he stopped. He defended his dad and cousins saying it’s just the generation his dad’s from, and that his cousins just had a poor upbringing.
I told him that joking like that really bothers me. He sort of relented and said that he’d try not to do it again, but that it should’ve been obvious that he was just joking and would never do that. Normally if he was joking about something kind of fucked up like that, he would say he was just joking right after. I don’t know whether or not I’m overreacting. I don’t honestly think he would ever actually do what he said, it’s just the way he joked about doing it that bothered me. It also put a damper on an otherwise really good day for us.
TLDR; fiancé made a fucked up joke on Valentine’s Day. It upset me, but not sure if I’m overreacting.
[link] [comments]
* This article was originally published here
No comments:
Post a Comment