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Tuesday, December 20, 2022

My[27f] sister[29f] has told my husband [28m] my children isn’t his

Tldr; my sister has been whispering in my husbands ear about my past and been putting him into contact with my ex boyfriend.

She told him about how I used to sleep with many many men when I was around 18-21. That was true and I’d just not mentioned it to my husband before.

Now when I was coming out that phase in my life I’d got a boyfriend. Now he cheated on me and I’d seen him cheat. So I cheated with someone else too. I know that was bad and I would never dream of doing it now but I was vengeful. My ex made sure to tell everyone and my sister said she liked the guy I cheated with and felt betrayed. None of this is good.

I met my husband at 23 and we were married when I was 25 and I now have two beautiful twins (7 month male and female). I’m pregnant again with another now and when I told my husband he didn’t seem as happy as he should have been. He didn’t seem over the moon at all just acted happy ish. That’s when I knew something was up, he’d been off for a while but then I knew something was wrong, if I’m honest I suspected him or cheating on me with another woman and that he would be leaving me for her.

Yesterday he sat me down looked me in the eye and asked me why I wasn’t being honest with him. He then explained that my sister told him everything about my past and I started crying. He then said he was in contact with my ex and he said what he was telling him matched up to how he was feeling now because I’m out meeting friends so much. He literally spat the word friends too like he thought it meant something else.

I told him that I’d changed and that I love him. He then said that he didn’t believe our children were his and that he knew I wasn’t faithful to him. I started crying at this point and just begged him to believe me. He just didn’t and I don’t know what to do. He also was asking me who I was with and demanding to know. He’s convinced I’m with his brother now because his brother lives pretty near and helps me out with the kids and comes our place a lot.

He’s now sleeping on the sofa and won’t talk to me at all and is convinced that I’m seeing other guys because I’m his head I couldn’t have changed. I don’t know what to do or how to convince him that they are his children. And even if he does end up believing me he will still be paranoid.

submitted by /u/throwRA-19951995
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* This article was originally published here

Sunday, December 18, 2022

Is it wrong or weird to find another girl interesting when you're in a long term relationship?

I'm (29M) currently in a long term relationship with a girl (31F) since 8 years ago and I still love her with the bottom of my heart. However, this week we got a new colleague (28F) at our clinic and she gives me the feeling of butterflies in my stomach even though we so far only have had short, mostly work-related conversations. Is it weird to feel this way despite barely knowing this girl? And also, this new girl seems to be in a relationship as well.

TLDR; I'm finding a new girl at work interesting even though I barely know her and I'm currently in a long term relationship.

submitted by /u/Bacgangster
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* This article was originally published here

Saturday, December 17, 2022

Does he (21m) like me (23f) or not?

We met (don't wanna say dating because I don't know if we are) a few times, and for me our energy kind of matched. We are getting along quite well and I feel really comfortable when I'm around him. To be honest, I maybe have a "minor" crush on him. But let's start in the beginning. When we first met I wasn't interested in a relationship and he didn't want just f+. We met like two times and then he told me he's not interested, he wants to date s/o but not me. That was ok for me, and I thought the case was closed. But then a few weeks later he called me in the middle of the night. We met again few days later, and that's when everything started to get confusing for me. I kinda noticed, that I really missed him and was surprised by the joy I felt seeing him again. He told me he kinda noticed what he had with me when I wasn't around anymore (to remember, we met twice before) and that he missed me too. Still confused I asked him what he actually wants from me...he just said he doesn't want a relationship. Okaayy?! I'm fine with that. Buuut when we see each other he tells me that he misses me, that he really likes being at my place and being with me. Otherwise, when we don't see each other, he never texts me. I know he's working a lot, I mean really a lot, but it seems to me like I'm not worth his time just texting me every other day. And he's never asking for meetings, it's always me. It's so intense when we are together, it feels like a perfect match, but when we don't see each other I'm so fucking confused. I don't know what we are, is there even a "we". Sometimes I think maybe I should just wait, maybe it needs time. But, on the other hand, I don't even know what I'm waiting for. I know, I should just ask him, but I don't wanna ask for a meeting again (he can do that too) and I don't wanna have that conversation on whatsapp. I hate not knowing where I stay with him.

TLDR: I like him. But he's sending me mixed signals, and I don't know what to think about it.

submitted by /u/validasHuehnchen
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* This article was originally published here

Friday, December 16, 2022

Am I (F23) too sensitive for my BF (M24)? His mental illness hurts me

Generally, he's very sweet. We live together and that's how we met. He will often walk me to work/college, he cooks me food when I come home late, he'll call me "sweetheart" all the time. He's very supportive when I'm down. However, sometimes when he's very down he doesn't want to cuddle and will tell me not to touch him. Then he feels guilty and says he's a bad boyfriend and "what's wrong with me, you're lovely, I shouldn't be so cold". He snapped at me yesterday while quite depressed. He said something about wanting to call in sick to work. I said he shouldn't because he'll feel worse about himself in the long run. From experience, when I start making excuses for myself, I spiral worse and feel so much worse. That's all I meant. He called me condescending, unsympathetic and said I wasn't his mom. I said I guess I can't do anything right. He stormed out of my room and didn't talk to me for 4 hours, until I tried catching him before work. He said he didn't have time for me, noticed I was upset (asked if I'd been crying- I was on the verge) and said he'd talk to me tomorrow?? When he was coming home at 11.30 and he knows I stay up till 1am usually. And knew I was upset??

He went straight to bed when he got home. I came to his room, said he had ruined my day with his stonewalling as I didnt know what was happening and he made me cry and if he cared at all, he wouldn't spoken to me after work or texted at the very least. He likened me to his emotionally abusive ex?? After a while he felt bad. Thing is, he clearly was quite depressed and I started to see it myself in his face as we got talking. He said something about feeling he can't be himself/trust people like me/our other roommates anymore. That i don't know the real him. He then said it's probably depression talking and apologised a lot. . However, he then said he has the right to be mad with me for a few hours or a day if he wants and he thinks it's manipulative for me to expected an argument to resolve after an hour or 2 of space when he needs space to cool off. Is this a bad relationship?

TLDR: BF with bipolar disorder is a bit of a jerk sometimes. Am I too sensitive for him?

submitted by /u/scaredvitbit
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* This article was originally published here

Thursday, December 15, 2022

Is it weird for a guy (M18) to say he really likes you (F18) when he barely knows you ?

I’ve just turned 18 a while ago and really I had never dated anyone before due to strict parents, my own insecurities and the fact that no guys has ever asked me out.

I’ve been in college for over two months and 6 days ago, this guy in my class started texting me and on the third day of us knowing each other, he asked me out.

I have very conflicted feelings for him because first of all, talking with him is the experience I had never have. It’s new and exciting and flattering. And, I’m afraid that I’d turn down a nice guy.

But honestly speaking, I don’t trust him. There’s this voice in the back of my head telling me this guy is not being sincere. Even though he’s been bombarding me with compliments and affection and constantly asking me out, I just don’t feel like he truly likes me. He told me he liked a presentation I did at class and implied that that’s how he noticed me but I find it suspicious. I don’t think that I’m ugly or unlovable but I certainly don’t think that someone would “really like” me just because of a class assignment i did, especially when that person has been in the same class with me for 2 months and didn’t even know I existed.

I told him he’s pushing it to hard and it is scaring me and his response was because he really liked me and then proceeded to ask me out again the next day.

I have talked to a few friends about whether should I keep talking to him and their opinions are 50/50. Some think I should try it while others think he’s being too shady.

I don’t have a lot of experience in this and I wonder if this is the gut feeling people always talk about or if it’s just my insecurities playing tricks in my head.

tl;dr: Is it weird for a guy (M18) to say he really likes you (F18) when he barely knows you ?

submitted by /u/taylorswiftforever
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* This article was originally published here

Wednesday, December 14, 2022

Is he falling too?

TL;DR: I’ve recently told someone I’ve been seeing that I have feelings for him. He admitted to liking me but said he needed time to sort some things out. Now he’s acting even sweeter. Am I crazy or is he beginning to feel the same?

I (25F) recently began seeing Casey (27M) **using fake names. Long story short I’ve begun developing feelings and made a post prior to this where I decided to call for a conversation.

I went to Casey’s house and he openly listened and validated everything I was saying. I told him that I like him and expected nothing in return. That he could refuse and I wouldn’t be hurt or spiteful. But that I absolutely needed to bring this up because if he wasn’t feeling the same then I needed to step away before he really did hurt my feelings. His response was very appropriate. It was something along the lines of “I like you too. But, I have some things I need to work through and it wouldn’t be fair for me to drag you through that”. I told him I was very vulnerable after what we’ve been doing and worried that he would just wake up and ghost me entirely one day. We talked it out and he assured me he would never do that and I said thank you for being upfront about everything else. Kicker is, we still spent all night together. We laughed nonstop, talked about everything under the sun, rolled around smoking a blizzy or two and then fell asleep in each others arms. In his house. In his bed. He was the one to wake me up when my alarm went off with small kisses and made sure to embrace and kiss me before I left.

Then last night. My cars getting serviced so I can’t smoke in my rental. I texted him earlier in the day asking if he could take me for a smoke drive so I could clear my head. When the time came to hangout he was with two buddies but still wanted to see me. So he picked me up and made one buddy move to the back so I could ride shotgun next to him. We dropped them off and went back to his place where we laughed, smoked, talked and again fell asleep in each others arms. I didn’t wake up till my 5:30 alarm went off. I got up and got dressed. When I snuck back over to the bed and leaned over to tell him I had to go he grabbed me and said “nooooooooo” and pulled me on top of him pinning me there. So I started planting small kisses up his neck and eventually gave a few passionate kisses before leaning back and saying I really had to go. He said no and kept holding me before finally letting me up. He helped me out of the door and gave me a big hug and a kiss and said to text him when I got here safely.

Side note to last night, he randomly got up at 1am to completely shave his beard off. He kept saying “this is all for you” “you made me do this” and when I’d ask what he meant he would just say he’s being facetious and not to worry about it.

I AM SO CONFUSED I feel like after these last interactions he’s showing little signs of wanting more with me but is afraid to admit it. It’s like he’s fighting this connection we have sometimes but then when we’re together it’s undeniable even for him. Am I reading too far into this?

TL;DR: I’ve recently told someone I’ve been seeing that I have feelings for him. He admitted to liking me but said he needed time to sort some things out. Now he’s acting even sweeter. Am I crazy or is he beginning to feel the same?

submitted by /u/mushroomorgan
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* This article was originally published here