I recently asked my ex (F22) to get back together, she rejected me before sleeping with someone else and then asking for me (M23) back. I don’t know what to do.

I recently asked my ex if she wanted to get back together after spending a few months getting closer again after a few months apart ( we dated for 3 years) , to which she said she didn’t feel the same but she still loved me and wanted me in her life as a friend.

It hurt but I ultimately accepted it and decided it was too hard to be her friend so I focused on moving on with life.

Fast forward a month and she reaches out to me, saying how much she misses me and wants to talk things through, and also tells me she’s slept with another guy while we weren’t talking. I don’t have an issue with either of us sleeping with other people when we aren’t together and while we had a few months apart we both did sleep with other people, but the person she slept with was someone she had previously told me she wouldn’t sleep with for personal factors, and that ultimately they just had sex because they wanted to and it wasn’t anything nothing more because he’s madly in love with another girl. But I don’t understand why she would deny a relationship, sleep with him and then ask to rekindle things.

I can’t tell if I’m overthinking or if I was just an option and she doesn’t have any respect for me. Please help me.

TL:DR; Ex rejected me, slept with someone else and asked for me back.

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My (29F) partner (25M) lied about his connection to some random women on Instagram

Hello! Me and my partner met at Instagram around 1,5 years ago. Long story short we fell in love and are now living together. However his instagram activity is making me feel very insecure and hurt and I would like to hear advice how to proceed forward.

He seemed to be following several attractive women (normal everyday women with max 1000 followers) from around the globe who share few same interest as him and I brushed it off thinking that he must have met them during travelling or so. Around six months ago I got curious about the women and asked him where does he know them (he openly talked about his friends and instagram profiles but alway avoided talking about the women). He got kind of apologetic and said he would unfollow the ones he followed during his single era. Then he said rest of the women she knows from gigs and parties and I accepted that. Few months ago I noticed he followed some new ones from other side of the planet and I got suspicious. Fast forward to this weekend I decided to confront him again and turns out he lied to me; he actually knew most of the women only from instagram. However he made me believe he has not messaged them. At that point I was having hard time trusting his words so I asked if it would be ok for me to check his instagram DM's and he let me take a look. Well, turns out he was lying again. He had long chat histories with the women and even messaged one of the woman he followed only few months ago. He had even suggested video calls with one of the ladies. I didn't scroll too much and not all of them since I got so hurt about him lying. Sure now that I think back, they were not sexting or anything, just friendly chatting. However the lying and trying to hide the connection to the women is what is so hurtful to me. He said he lied about them because he was worried I would get my feelings hurt. And I cannot understand why would he do actions that he feels that would hurt me and he needs to hide the actions from me. I would be completely fine with him having online friends if he would openly talk about them but he chose to lie on top of a lie about them. That's why it's very hard for me to believe that he just wanted to be friends with cool people with similar interests (all the women in this case were young, good looking bodies, cute faces. Yes it seemed like his type in women which I also fit into. He said he followed themfor their art etc. but several of them had only revealing, pretty selfies and general life pictures. And he was mostly liking the face selfies and revealing bodyshot pictures. He said it is just a coincidence that he is not following any unattractive people).

I try hard to understand his point of view. We come from completely different cultures and in his cultures it is worse thing to hurt someones feelings than speak the truth. In my culture it's seen as very negative to avoid telling the truth, and people are brutally honest even if it hurts feelings. He says the women know about me, and it would be fun to party together if they ever come to our country and expressed to some of the women it would be nice to visit their cities someday. He is also very friendly and cute guy, and easily gets attention of the women he likes. I guess I'm afraid he was using the random women for boosting his ego because before he has been kind of bragging about how much girls numbers he would get in the past etc..

Anyway, now we are lost how to proceed. I obviously feel hurt and like trust issues are forming and he also feels hurt and tired. How could we build better communication and intimacy between eachother? I wish he could feel open and safe enough to talk with me about anything, and wouldn't need to feel like he needs to hide something from me.

TLDR; partner following random, regural attractive women from around the globe and I recently found out he was lying about who they are and what kind of connection he has to them

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* This article was originally published here

My friends don’t like me but I have no one else and I don’t know what to do

My friends don’t like me but I have no one else and I don’t know what to do

I’m a 17 y/o male, I have a group of around 6-7 friends including myself but I don’t really feel like I’m friends with them, including my actual closest friend who I have known for over 8 years. For a bit of backstory, I started making music around July/August last year under the name Icenttori, because I didn’t want people to really find it. From then I was promoting it on TikTok and I was gradually getting more views on there, until one of my vids got around 40k views and a bunch of kids at school found it, which I was fine with because at that point because I thought my music had improved a lot by then. However, since people found it, people have been kinda clowning me for it, and I think my friends don’t like being associated with me anymore. I no longer get invited to things, I can’t talk without getting interrupted or anyone listening, they talk badly about me when they think I’m not there, and it’s kinda made my life miserable. And one of the things that hurts the worst is my closest friend acts like he’s friends with me when it’s just me and him, but around others he acts like we aren’t friends. I’m not really sure what to do because I have no one else, and I would really appreciate some advice.

TLDR; people at school clown me for making music, and I now friends don’t like me because of it

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I’m (20sM) in a relationship with someone (20sF) that none of our parents or friends think we should be in

We met in college, we’re both in our early 20s. We’ve been dating for about a year. Things started out like any relationship does with a nice honeymoon period. After that nice month and a half, things just started going downhill so quickly.

Since then, we have these periods where we fight with one another in these massive blowouts a few times a week, to then having a pretty good week or even a pretty good month. The cycle always seems to reset itself. Despite us having a really good month together, we’ve been fighting nonstop over various issues for the past 3 days.

We admittedly both have terrible communication skills in our own ways which only amplifies the intensity of our fights. We are also both in therapy with the topic of our arguments being discussed on both ends, with myself personally trying to use it as an approach to handling conflicts in a healthier way in general.

We do love each other but it seems like we can’t help but be at each other’s throats all the time. We’ve shared so many happy moments together and I don’t take those for granted.

All of our parents have caught on to the pattern. They all see us when we bicker and fight so frequently. My parents, for one, think that I should leave her as they don’t think we are compatible. I can only imagine her parents think the same after seeing the hell we put each other through. The same can be said about our friends. Both of our circles of friends generally don’t think our relationship is healthy for either of us.

10 months of this relationship have been the exact same in terms of the amount of horrible fights we have that literally last for hours at a time. I’m not sure which hurts more, the idea of leaving her or staying with her. Despite the happiness she gives me it just pains me to keep going through all of this over and over again. Are there any other things that could be worked on? I’m not sure what else to try.

tl;dr We fight a lot but still love each other, practically everyone in our lives is telling us to leave the other. I’m not sure what else to try to make things better between us.

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Am I in the wrong to be upset?

I (F24) have been with my boyfriend (M23) for a year now and his family acts like I do not exist. I have two children, have been with him for a year and his family still refers to me by his “girlfriend”. no name, ever. When I have tried to get us to visit so I can try to mingle with the family there’s always a reason from his parents for us not to go.

They have categorized me with past girlfriends that were incredibly toxic, which these were all high school girlfriends who managed to happily be invited into the family.

Right after telling me they won’t mistreat me like my ex husband and others have. However they do NOT know me enough to make such a judgement call. All I ask is these people learn my name and maybe act like I am someone who is seriously involved with their son.

A “fresh start” has been offered and I agreed to said fresh start however it isn’t sitting right with me. I can’t for the life of me wrap my head around why a fresh start is required when I have done nothing that needs a fresh start. They’re the ones who have been disrespectful to me as a human being, as their sons partner.

Family is important to me and I love my boyfriend, a lot. But I can’t see myself with a partner who’s family is so disrespectful and insignificant to our relationship.

My boyfriend and his mother have basically blamed this on the fact that I am “going through alot” right now and I think that, that is incredibly unfair. No amount of anything else I am going through has to feel with the fact they make me feel like dirt on the bottom of their shoes.

Am I overreacting ? All I know is how I feel I have felt sick to my stomach for 24 hours now. And I don’t know what to do.

TL;DR - Have been with boyfriend for one year, his family acts as though I don’t exist, refer to me as “girlfriend” instead of my name. Lacking the basic respect for a human being. Am I wrong to be upset ?

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* This article was originally published here

Giving closure.

Hi guys.

I, (23m), just ended things with my gf, (24f), after 4 years. To cut a long story short, I had been thinking about breaking up for about a year. I just always knew we weren't compatible on a lot of levels. She was a lot more in love with me than I was, including right up to the end.

This was my first break up and admittedly I was very immature in the lead up to it. I told her I needed to work on the relationship about a month before yet I just got really distant and eventually ended it.

The reasons I told her for the split was that I didn't love her anymore and that I don't know why but the feelings just left. I care about her more than anyone I ever have, and I want to make sure this breakup goes well for her. She needs to get some of her stuff from mine at some stage, so is there anything I can do to give her more closure, or is it just a fact that closure or not its going to hurt the same?

TL;DR: I want to give my ex more closure following a sudden breakup.

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My fiancé wants to take a break to have sex with other girls

TL;DR My fiancé wants to take a break to have sex with other girls. He said he’s bored of our sex

My fiancé (27y) and I (22y) have been together for 2 years. We got engaged 4 months ago. For the first 1.5 years, our relationship was great and we had the best sexual chemistry. He recently told me that he would like to take a break for a month because he doesn’t feel as sexually attracted to me as he used to. He told me he loves me deeply but he is getting bored of our sex. He thinks that I’m a good girl and will make a great wife. But he feels guiltily about having strong sexual urges for other girls. He told me the “spark” isn’t there anymore. He’s been thinking about this for months and never really voiced it to me. It’s only been two days since we started our break and he already went on a date with another girl yesterday. He is planning to sleep with at least 3 girls during our break.

He had told his family about our situation and his mum asked me to come over today for a talk. I spoke to his mum and his siblings and they were all on my side. They’re very supportive and told me that I deserve to be treated better. Everyone in his family will be try to talk him out of sleeping with other girls and taking this break. They are all very mad at him. They know he still has feelings for me but think he has commitment issues. They said he is known to never commit to a girl but they thought he changed when he met me. For the first time in his life he told them that he sees himself settling down with a girl.

I feel very stuck. I don’t know what to do. Everyone is saying that they think he will realise this is a mistake and will return to me. I love him so much and I want us to work things out. But I know I deserve to be treated so much better than this.

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* This article was originally published here