How do I tell dad I don't want to keep any relationship with him?

I know it sounds bad but there's a long story behind it. I'm 22F, my mom is 46F and Dad is 48M. 7 years ago my mom cheated on dad. They got divorced and mom started dating the guy she cheated on dad with 35M, they're now married.

My dad has been verbally abusive and greedy throughout his life. I was 15 when they divorced and a custody battle ensued where my mom wont primary custody of me with me spending 2 days a week with dad. He berated mom which was then reasonable for what happened but over time it got so bad he openly told me he wished he could strangle mom. My mom was wrong to have an affair but she's been an incredible mom. She gave birth to my stepbrother 2 years after their divorce.

My dad is always obsessed with mom and her husband. He won't move on and let them move on. He won't seek therapy or any other way that can help him. On the other hand, my mom and her husband have always been supportive of me.

Why do I want to cut my dad from my life? I'm tired of the berating and abuses he hurls my mom. I'm going to move out next year(I'm living with mom and her husband) whenever I stay at dad it's a hellfire for me. What to do?

Tldr: My dad was greedy and now is abusive after my mom cheated on him and remarried. How do I tell him I don't want to keep any relationship with him?

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Looking for a podcast guest to share funny/ bad relationship stories

Hi guys! Recently started a podcast and I’d love to find someone to do an episode with who has a particularly interesting relationship story. (My episodes go for upwards of 40 minutes so please be able to have more than a 5 minute conversation) a little bit about myself…I’m Jake, 22 and gay. Have been in a 3 year relationship plus 2 other shorter ones and have dealt with my fair share of strange men🤣. Gone on a date with the tallest man in Australia (he stole my jacket), dated an AFL umpire and went on 4 dates with a man who’s Dad owned a private jet. Ifyou think you’d be a good fit and have any interesting stories I’d love to hear from you!

TL;DR: looking for a podcast guest, am gay, was engaged at one point in my first relationship, looking for people with interesting stories

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Boyfriend moved in with ex crush and got angry at me for feeling upset about them having dinner and wine alone

Boyfriend (now ex) moved in with a girl (super hot) who he used to have a crush on years ago but no longer present. I told him it made me uncomfortable but it was ok, with time, that feeling would go away and I asked him to be patient with me. And so he was. But we had a few issues in terms of what we found acceptable in a relationship, so we did have a few disagreements but had only argued once about it. We’re both 28 but decided to post here because honestly I am at an age where I wouldn’t mind settling and finding a partner for life (I thought it would be him)

But one night he was having dinner with her and he went and bought pasta, wine and he has never cooked for me before and I felt really bad but didn't say anything to him. But when they were having dinner, he didn't reply to me and he knew I was home alone so it made me jealous. I called him and told him I'm not okay with that but by that time I was really angry and was a bit rude to him and he broke up with me due to my “reaction”.

I apologized and explained myself but he told me he felt nothing for me anymore and that the "sweet girl" image he had of me was gone. I told him that it was the first time I got really upset over something that he would reconsider his decision, but he left me. I begged and pleaded and did all those silly things obviously nothing worked so I asked if we could at least talk in person and after a few days he came over.

When we talked in person about our break up, I asked him if I could have joined them for dinner or having wine with some time, them he said absolutely not, that I wasn't welcomed and this was a moment between the two of them. I felt really hurt hearing this as if it were the other way around, I'd definitely want my SO there or at least wouldn't have replied in that way.

To me, it's different than being out with "the boys" or spending time in a group of friends. When I asked him if she was more important to him than I was he said "absolutely" and you don't get to tell me what I do and I don't with my friends. And I told him that I really don't, but it would be nice to have some sort of reassurance when I'm still getting used to the idea of him moving in with this girl. I've never been through a similar situation before so it was really mentally hard.

Not saying he would physically cheat on me, but that kind of dynamic leaves space for creating a bigger intimacy that in my point of view should happen between your partner and you.

I never asked him to stop being friends with her or move out.

He broke up with me saying it was 100% my fault because I overreacted to which I explained to him it’s been an ongoing issue for me as I’m struggling to be ok with it but at the same time I had never acted that way before, I just got really annoyed at that moment, but I think every relationship there's something you can learn, even when I was in abusive relationships on the other side, I still learnt.

I am frustrated as this is really eating my brain alive because apart from that, we got along great, he was the best to me and I was really nice to him as well, we had good communication, looked after each other, laughed at lot, like legit the best relationship I've ever had because it was so organic and natural, and he would also tell me he felt the same so it's still really fresh. I've spoken to several people telling both sides of the story and most agreed they'd be hurt too in my position but I want some outside perspective too.

Truth of matter is, I am REALLY struggling with this. It was a short relationship and it is hurting so much more than my longer ones. I want to crawl into a hole and not come out.

PS: please don't be mean, this has been really tough on me :(

TLDR: Boyfriend moved in with ex crush and got angry at me for feeling upset about them having dinner and wine alone

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I (31M) feel I don't deserve my girlfriend (26F) and I wonder if I should let her go so she can have someone better.

My girlfriend and I were friends for a year until we got closer and hit it off a year after that. Eventually we got together, and she is everything I ever wanted in a woman. I feel this is the first time I've truly loved somebody and found the right person for me. She has said the same to me too.

But this has been gnawing at me for a while, which is the insecurity I feel with her a lot of times. First, my girlfriend has a day job, but she's also a beautiful singer and has a successful career performing and making her own music. She sings all different kinds of styles (like opera, rock, R&B) and she is genuinely great at them all. She comes from a nice family, she went to a nice college, her life is honestly amazing. Me: I'm a contractor, I had a rough upbringing, didn't go to college, I don't make that much...I know she loves me, but sometimes I don't get why she chose me, and it is very obvious when I am introduced and people learn what I do, they look confused as well. I feel totally out of place in her circles and her life and just our leagues in life.

And then we are an interracial relationship; my girlfriend is Black and I am a white man. There's no easy way to say this but I basically do not feel "cool" enough for her. My girlfriend sings R&B styles often which is a beautiful expression of Black culture but it does make me think of how she could easily choose a Black guy to be with, who understands that world and fits her personality and style better.

Now before this gets misconstrued, this is not some secret plot to get rid of my girlfriend because I actually want someone else (I've seen such accusations made before on Reddit.) I would love to stay with her, our emotional and mental and physical connection is amazing, I honestly don't want to leave her. I sometimes feel like an asshole for feeling this way because my girlfriend tells me almost everyday she loves me, she wants me, etc. but she doesn't know these internal feelings/doubts of mine.

TL;DR My girlfriend is out of my league and I feel a lot of insecurity for being with her. What can I do to alleviate these feelings or what do I need to learn?

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Met an old flame. Boyfriend is deeply hurt.

TDLR: I met an old flame I went out with briefly 4 years ago, since I thought the past is in the past. My boyfriend was deeply hurt though.

My boyfriend (33) and I (26) have been together for over seven months and are very very much in love. Last week, I got a message from an old friend, who I went out with on two dates about four years ago. It's probably worth mentioning here that I kinda self-sabotaged the relationship with this guy because I was in a really bad and vulnerable place mentally. We had no real closure, but he still remained a good friend and stayed in touch with me, even after he left the country. Anyway, so when this friend texted, he said he was back in town for two days and invited me to a gathering of our old friend group. I was under the assumption that because we hadn't been anything in a really long time, and because I have no feelings left, it'd be okay to go and say hello. I was upfront with my boyfriend about this and while he wasn't thrilled about it, he didn't stop me from doing so. But when I did return from the meeting, my boyfriend seemed really cold, upset and distant, which he never is. And while he's usually really affectionate, this time he wasn't. His main pain point stems from the fact that he feels that my friend (the past flame) still harbours romantic feelings. I feel really sad and helpless. I had no intention whatsoever to hurt my boyfriend, but this feels terrible. He did mention that he loves me very much quite a few times, but that he doesn't know how to process/deal with thus pain. I'm utterly confused and hurt myself. Any advice would help. Thanks.

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I’ve been rejected by every person I’ve dated and I don’t know what to do.

I (22F) have had a laughably tragic dating life. I know I’m young, but I’ve dated many people and no one ever seems to want to commit to a relationship with me….

When I ask them, they never say that I’m the reason they don’t want to pursue something, it’s always something with them or the circumstances. For example:

1. My HS gf cheated on me with multiple ppl and was in love with her straight best friend

2. My first college fling: Talked to this one guy for 2 months, things seemed fine, then one day he cuts me off because he has a new girlfriend….

3. Talked to this slightly older one guy in college on and off for a couple years before giving him a chance. We went on dates, texted, he took my virginity, and things seemed good for a few months…then he ghosted me/my birthday plans and cut me off because he had just gotten into a long distance relationship…this one hurt quite a bit because we were friends for a couple years

4. Went through a series of short lived flings after this. This period lasted like…a year

5. Talk to this one guy exclusively for like 9 months. He said he wasn’t ready for a relationship with me yet but wanted to date me in the future. His reasoning was relationship anxiety and the fact that he was busy with his new job. He would get super passive aggressive if I brought up talking to other guys. Every time I tried to tell him I don’t think were compatible he’d get upset and change his behavior for like 2 weeks before reverting back. Never asked me to be his girlfriend but we were exclusive, went on dates, bought eachother gifts….yeah. It eventually fizzled out and I moved away.

6. (Present situation) About 3 months later I move to a new city and start talking to another guy. He wanted us to talk exclusively too because “he doesn’t compete”. I’m not used to being told this so early on but I apprehensively went with it. We went on dates, texted constantly, would have sleepovers, he would kiss me at my doorstep and get sad when I fell asleep before him….yesterday we had another date/sleepover and he kissed me and dropped me off. 10 minutes later he texts me that he doesn’t think we should be a thing because he’s going to be busy with school, working out, and work, doesn’t feel romance with me, but was also afraid of “simping” for me (his exact words). This only lasted a month but I’m pretty bummed. I feel blindsided but also embarrassed. I feel like im just not worth pursuing something with.

I want to fix myself but I don’t even know what’s wrong because no one will be real with me. On paper I feel like I seem interesting: I think I look fine (scroll through my profile to see what I look like), I have a good job (I do research at a prestigious hospital), I have hobbies that aren’t just media consumption (hiking, cooking, crocheting), and I’ve always been told I have a cute/funny personality by people. I started researching attachment theory and I keep getting anxious or avoidant attachment depending on the test. I’m trying to get into therapy but the waitlist I’m on is weeks long……idk what to do at this point

TLDR: no one I date, no matter their race or gender, seems to be interested in pursuing a relationship with me. I feel unlovable and want to fix myself but im unsure how to.

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Am I being taken for granted?

Am I being taken for granted? If not, what is happening?

Ok ok this is really long but I dont know how to make it shorter I'm sorry

So to preface this, I wanna say the following examples are recent and stand alone. Otherwise he is totally doting and loving as he always has been and I feel I may be over reacting. Let me know.

So, my boyfriend (19M) and I (18F) are coming up on our one year anniversary. And he is and has been the absolute sweetest. However there have been a couple things lately that is starting to make me think he is beginning to take me for granted.

So for starters: The other night we were talking and I asked if he could pick me up from work and if we could hang out at his place after again (we have done this a couple times now) and he said yes.

Next day when I call after work, not only is he doing and errand but he made plans to call with a friend and play games with him when he gets back. I'm understanding, he is very forgetful and he hasn't seen/talked with this friend in months so ofc I say go for it. He promises me he'll call when he is done, should be 2 hours, and then he'll pick me up. This is around 4pm.

Around 6 I remember I have to deposit a check and ask him if when he is done he can give me a ride, since the bank is on the way to his house, and he agrees. 4 hours later I realized that my curfew (yes I'm 18 with a 10pm curfew I hate my mom too) is an hour away and he has yet to text me at all, so I ask my mom if she can take me to the bank as I needed this check deposited. She said she could at 9:30. At 10pm I text my bf that I did it with my mom, and that I was rather angry he didn't even text to say his call was lasting longer than usual and he couldn't be my ride. He apologized profusely, saying he lost track of time and he feels like an idiot.

Today was almost a breaking point for me. So for a lil background, he and I decided over Christmas to brew mead together this summer. (I know it's weird. We are weird) This has, from the start, been a bit of a power struggle. It is being kept at his house, we are using his kitchen and ingredients, and despite me doing majority of the research on how to do it, he seems to inherently veiw this as his project. The reason I say this is because I wanted to try a sip and he got upset, saying how he didn't want to taste it until it was done, that would ruin it for him, etc. Went so far as to say it was kept at his house, so his rules.

Needless to say that did NOT go over well with me. Anyway, so today he tells me racked it WITHOUT me and ended up tasting it!! I was absolutely livid, and he did apologize saying it was stupid to have yelled at me about wanting to taste it earlier.

Ok last one. So also today, when we were having spicy time and he was pleasuring me he suddenly started singing to himself, then said he needed to watch the music video for the song he was singing. I was upset but I let it slide. After we watched the video tho, we went back to cuddles and he didn't continue what he had been doing previously. I told him off about this, and he apologized, trying to make up for it but I wasn't in the mood.

✨TL;DR my bf forgot his promise to me one day, and next I learned he drank something he yelled at me for wanting to drink, and interrupted spicy time wanting to watch a music video✨

So, am I being taken for granted, or is he just being absent minded. If any of these were isolated I wouldn't see any problems, all of them are irritating but understandable. It's them all put together in such a short amount of time that makes me worried.

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