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Tuesday, July 4, 2023

Am I wrong or is my friend making excuses to not meet me?

Am I wrong or is my friend making excuses to not meet?

My (23f) school friend (23f) is moving out of the country. She’s been inviting me to come visit her city for years and now that she’s moving she told me “so when are you coming”

I told her I’ll come on her birthday, and when her birthday comes around and I am about to book the flight, she kind of ignores me. After insisting , she replies that she can host me but her house has too many guests, no place to sleep, it’ll be better if I come a few days later. So I say okay makes sense. I say we’ll chat again when I am about to book.

Her bday comes. I put up a bday post and she reposts saying “come soon”

Few days go by, I text her about booking flight tickets. She says she’s free the whole week, and later she’s busy. Now I text her the 2 days out of the free week when i can go. She stops replying ( we were texting instantly)

I wait an hour and send her a voice note, saying reply to my text. She calls me then, tells me she’s busy with other commitments. So I say okay cool we’ll meet when we meet then.

I am confused, and a bit annoyed coz she’s been adamant on me coming to meet her. And when I come around to going, she acts weird.

Now she’s leaving and I dont know if Iam supposed to call and chat it up with her.

Tl;dr - my friend who insists I come to visit her before she leaves the country, ghosted/ became busy when I tried booking tickets to meet her. Idk if I should be a bit annoyed or call and chat with her before she leaves.

submitted by /u/ShallotFront5920
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* This article was originally published here

Monday, July 3, 2023

I feel like my(34F) partner(36M) enjoys pissing me off

English is my 2nd language so excuse the mistakes.I live in South Asia and we are muslims.

Recent example , we had eid this weekend ( islamic holiday thing ) and i went to his parents place , he spent 2 and half days commenting oh wow you guys are getting along so well didnt you have a big fight last time , subtly complaining to his sisters about me etc.The last evening of eid , my BIL's wife's parents were to visit , so her and me we were coordinating about chores like who does what etc and my partner was again going wow look at you acting like sisters etc i feel like he was looking forward to us fighting or having a screaming match over something tiny.Half an hour before the parents were to visit i told my husband to get my son ( 4 ) to dress up because i was busy in kitchen. I heard my son crying and i asked from the kitchen why is the kid crying and he didnt say anything so i just went ah w/e i will check later because a lot of time when i leave my kid with partner kid ends up crying because either he gets hurt or partner takes away his toys or disrupts his play .and then they come down and the kid has the ugliest haircut and partner is smiling so BIG and i loose it , i told him multiple times to not give him a haircut at home , we were discussing the haircut and i told him to get it after eid because rn the shops are overcharging and we are very tight on money , like barely for food kind of tight , he goes and goes his dad was one who cut the kid's hair and i am too obedient to say anything, its not that bad , they will grow back, i didnt know you like his hair so much. I asked the kid who cut your hair and he says dad.i went back in the kitchen after screaming for 5 minutes and he went to the other room , when the BIL's in laws came my husband went on loudly look how good of a haircut kid has and i have no right to be mad etcSo my question is what explains his behaviour and how do i deal with it until i can leave him ? i am doing everything to take care of my mental health to stay calm with his antics and he refuses couple therapy

tldr; partner does things that he know will piss me off and uses his bad memory as an excuse

submitted by /u/Rare_Day9799
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* This article was originally published here

Sunday, July 2, 2023

I'm (23f) so disgusted about my yesterday behavior with a guy (26m) I like

I want to throw up every time I remember what I did yesterday. It was nothing super serious but I feel so ashamed and disappointed in myself.

So we had a work party yesterday and there were all my coworkers, including the guy I have a crush on. Short story: I always liked him and though he was was hot and 2 months ago we suddenly matched on tinder and actually talked for some weeks. He really seemed interested but then he started answering more and more slowly and we just stopped talking.

After that all our live interactions are super mega awkward. He talks with all girls super normally but I'm literally the only one he ignores and he didn't even try to hide it.

So yesterday I was a little bit drunk and I started doing tooo much to grab his attention. Like going to the group of people where he was to try to enter in the conversation even thought I don't have anything in common with them and my friends were on the other side. Then I tried one time to go to the bathroom at the same time as he just to try to intercept with him. Then I standed awkwardly in the kitchen where he was just to he there, I really wasn't doing anything. And the final one, I tried to go home in the car with the group that he was going. And that I think was the most stupid and creepiest one.

He doesn't care about me. I even have the feeling that every time he would enter in a room and see that I was there he would just leave because of me. There was even a time when He, me and another girl were sitting together, they were talking (super energetically and enthusiastically, if he doesn't have a crush on her it really felt like he has lol) and as soon as she left the room, he got up and also left the room in rush just to not talk with me AHAHAHA.

As soon as the alcohol started disappearing from my body I understood the things I did the entire day and I felt so irritated and stupid. Begore leaving the party I didn't even said Bye to him because I was feeling that he's so done with me. But he actually waved to me with a smile.

I regret so much going there. I wish I could just ignore him and show him that I doesn't care, as he does. But everytime I have the opportunity to be near him I just can't walk away. What should I do next time when something like this happens? At this time I don't even think there's a possibility of juat being friends because he's afraif to rven ask me how my job is going. That tinder match ruined everything argh.

Tl;dr - Was trying too kuch to grab the attention of my coworker that I like and I feel so stupid.

submitted by /u/engrape
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* This article was originally published here

Saturday, July 1, 2023

Partner texting my new female acquaintance

I’m in an age gap relationship since 7 months back. My boyfriend (53) and I (28) went to an event in April where I met a woman my age that I spoke to. This woman reached out to my last month saying she liked me and asked if I would like to hang out one day. We decided that we are going to meet for a friend date, however we haven’t gotten the chance to meet her yet due to busy schedule and me getting sick. I told my partner about her snd said it would be fun to connect to her because I want to have more female friends in my age.

I found out today that my partner had added her on social media as a friend and has been texting her without telling me. He showed me the first message he sent her where he said that he is friends with me and is looking for new friends.

Am I wrong for being furious at him? I’m disappointed that he reached out her, I find it embarrassing and strange that he is writing to her. They didn’t even talk at the event we met her at. And I’m also mad at him for saying he is friends with me when we are clearly in a romantic relationship. What’s your opinion in this?

(I know it’s a huge age gap but we have a lot in common and same interests which led is to connect really well).

TL,DR: My old boyfriend is texting a new female friend behind my back

submitted by /u/twotimestake
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* This article was originally published here

Friday, June 30, 2023

Should I end contact with an old friend?

I've had this friend since the 5th grade, and we're in our 30s now. We used to be best friends for years from 5th grade all the way to high school, and beyond. In the last 5 or 6 years, we sort of fell out with each other for no real reason.

My friend vouched for me at this IT company, and got me a job there. Long story short, he ended up getting laid off after a few years and I stayed. I got promoted to a manager level, while he went off and began working for another company.

Ever since his lay off, we sort of stopped "hanging out" I guess. We're not on bad terms or anything, but we're just not close anymore.

I haven't hung out 1-on-1 with him in over... probably 6 years; long before his lay off happened. We chat all the time on discord, but it's not the same. The guy is also completely addicted to video-games, which may have something to do with this. I can see his steam profile, and he games anywhere from 120 hours to 150 hours of games PER 2 WEEKS. It's crazy, but whatever.

He's also made some pretty hurtful comments in the past. Now he's making more money than me in his new job, and one time he told something along the lines of "I'm making more money than you now, and you're still stuck in that shithole" which was totally out of left field and random to me. It was kind of bizarre, because I didn't do anything to cause his lay off. The company lost some contracts, and had to lay off a substantial part of the staff. But, ever since then I've been promoted and I make way better money than I did when we were both working there; but yes, he still makes more than me.

Which I don't understand... If he makes more money than me now, why would he be bitter towards me? I don't really get it.

Point is, what should I do? We don't hang out, we're not close. I don't even know if I could consider him a friend at this point anyway...

Thoughts? Any questions I can field are totally fine. I just want to know if I should just slowly end all contact with him, since it seems like this friendship isn't really serving either of us anymore.

But, at the same time; I have alot of great memories with him from the past and I feel like he's not the same person I used to be close with.

TLDR: Longtime friend has become distant, and no longer initiates 1-on-1 hangouts with me. Unsure if he's bitter about a lay off from a job we both held, or if he's just gotten bored of the friendship. Need advice on how to handle it from my end.

submitted by /u/cknting
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* This article was originally published here

Thursday, June 29, 2023

I (23M) broke up w my now ex-gf (23F) because I was angry at her but instantly regretted and said sorry the next day but she doesn’t have feeling for me anymore. What should I do?

We had been together for over 5 years and had been thru many stages. I broke up with her when i was angry at her and instead of talking it out, i just broke up w her. On the next day, I instantly regretted my action and went to her to say sorry but she said she doesn’t have feeling for me anymore and she feel better on her own, she even deleted all of our photos on her phone. She gave me 1 month to show her that I love her but she didn’t cooperate and acted cold toward me, we still exchange message but she just replied with “ok”, I took her to work and picked her up from work, cooked for her and took her out for dinner… but nothing seem to improve. And I know for now she doesn’t put effort in any other guy. Both her and my parents support this love to become marriage on the next year but this seem so hopeless. Should I give her space or should I try to show her my affection? What should I do?

TL;DR: I broke up with my gf because I was angry at her but regretted and said sorry the next day but she said she doesn’t have feeling for me anymore and I try to save this relationship

submitted by /u/viethq0023
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* This article was originally published here

Wednesday, June 28, 2023

How do i f20 tall about sex to my m20 partner?

How do I talk with my partner about sex?

First of all, im sorry if this is the wrong sub but here it goes, I F20 have been together with my boyfriend M20 for 2 years and we have a good sex life but it's kind of boring, we're each other's firsts and I try to do all kinds of things that he likes, I'm getting him off in a lot of different ways but he doesn't really reprociates that.

Usually we just do the penetrant aspect, he finishes and since that doesn't really do a lot for me, he Usually talks to me until I'm done too (by myself) . I feel kind of left out of the whole thing which is stupid considering that it's something that should be done between the two of us and not just him and don't know how to bring it up without making him feel bad about himself.

Does anyone have tips? Any advice helps, I'm just kind of scared of confrontation

Tldr: boyfriend doesn't really offer variety during sex

submitted by /u/jsjsjsj-enwwk
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* This article was originally published here