I (25M) have a beautiful girlfriend whom I'll call Anna (22F), we've been together for over a year. I truly love Anna deeply and can envision a life with her, which is what I want to preface this with.
Around two months ago, I was out at a bar one weekend with some friends in downtown Seattle (where I live) where I unexpectedly saw my ex-girlfriend whom I'll call Zoe (25F). We got to talking, I had no ill intentions at this point, she was practically just an old friend whom I hadn't seen for like over five years (in the seven years since we broke up we'd only seen each other once, and not for long; at a mutual friend's funeral five years ago).
Some info on Zoe: we've both grown up in a town by the outskirts of Seattle. We were childhood friends, and began dating since we were 13. We were high-school sweethearts; Zoe was my first kiss, my first girlfriend, my first love- everything. When we went to college (I stayed in Seattle, she moved to Colorado for college) we broke up soon enough into our freshman years due to the long distance. We ended things amicably and on a good note, and haven't spoken since we bumped into each other at that bar.
After hanging out, we exchanged numbers and decided to keep in contact. Zoe and I have been texting regularly these past couple months, everything has been strictly platonic between us.
I have told Anna about this, and how she felt; she stated that she wasn't sure why I had to keep in contact with Zoe now, especially after all these years, but that she trusted me. And that she wouldn't like the idea of us hanging out alone.
Yesterday, it was the fifth year anniversary of the death of one of mine and Zoe's mutual friends, whom we'd known since high school. The friend's family and a bunch of our mutual friends and classmates gathered together in her honour, at her grave and then by the lake we used to hangout together; we all caught up and just talked about our memories of her. It was a nice and nostalgic but pretty emotional day.
After everyone left the lake by dark once it was time to go home, Zoe asked if I wanted to get a drink. I agreed, we went to a bar alone and did just that. Only that. Talked, caught up, and got a little drunk. For a fair bit of that time we were talking about the memories of our passed friend.
I got home late that night, around 2am, to my angry girlfriend. I'd only just realised I had three missed calls and a bunch of missed texts from her, since I had told her before I'd be home by around 10pm after the gathering by the lake. She asked where I'd been, that I was meant to be home ages ago; and I told her the truth: the gathering, and I went for drinks at a bar with Zoe and lost track of time and wasn't on my phone. Anna was furious, we had a massive fight and haven't spoken.
TL;DR Hung out alone with ex despite gf's request. Am I in the wrong? It was all platonic.
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* This article was originally published here
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