This might seem like a general question, but I have had it happen to me more than once. I seem to always catch feelings for the 'dominant' types if you like (I am anything but that, introverted, caring and somewhat socially awkward, etc) and nearly always it ends the same way, with a broken heart. This time has been no different, with one small exception. She doesn't know, and all going well she's not going to.
I won't bore you with great details. But more or less I (24M) am attracted to this girl (22F) who works at my local pub. I have somewhat of a history with her so it was awkward at the start, but we're all good now and it was not long after we smoothed things over that I realised I had feelings. Or at least I think they are, but I do at very least think she is somewhat hot. Maybe it's her looks, maybe it's the way she carries herself, maybe it's just because I have a history with those types of people. I don't know.
The reason I wonder why it's actual feelings or not, is because for the first time ever apparently, the realisation did hit me at some point that we would not work. Apart from her being tied down anyway, we have very friggen little common interests, and while we do get on that's for a few hours one day a week. Every day, I feel would be a different story. That's not to even mention my actual chances with her regardless (slim to none imo).
I have 8 months (the pub's closed for renovations) to try and forget about this stuff and, jee wiz I hope I do.
But my question is, why does this stuff happen? Why is it that we can fancy people that we know we're not compatible with? We know it, I mean I had a girl who was almost exactly the same (with a few exceptions) basically gaslight me for years and it completely shattered me. To the point that I havn't felt anything for anyone, more or less until now.
Deep down though, there is that burning desire for it to work. Why?
TL;DR: Caught feelings for a girl that I have next to no chance of getting in with, and even if I did I doubt it would work. Why do we still want what we cannot have?
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