My boyfriend(25M) of 4 years and I(25F) moved abroad 3 months ago. We moved to a country with a 2 year visa and where he has some relatives but I do not have any.
Some important points for context: - The move was more important to me than to him but we had planned it for 2 years before finally moving and he repeatedly said he was sure about the move.
We are lucky to both work remotely and so out work and financial stability was not affected by the move.
He is not very close with his immediate family and so there was no big loss in that relationship by moving.
So since we moved he has made it clear he does not particularly like the country and since the pandemic he has been struggling with his mental health. He stopped seeing his therapist a few months ago despite my objections. He also said the move has made his mental health worse.
3 weeks ago, he told me he wanted to go home and figure out if was in a position to be in this relationship. We argued and he went to a hotel for a couple of nights. We both thought he would come back after a few nights of space.
Over the phone, we came to the conclusion that he should go home and I should stay to figure out what we both want. I wanted him to stay but didn’t push it because I didn’t want him to resent me if I tried to prevent a trip home.
He got a flight out the next day without coming back to our place to say goodbye.
I spent the next 2 weeks feeling extremely upset. I ultimately felt like he should have stayed to figure it out together and I was angry he never said goodbye.
I also gradually got more and more angry that he left me in a foreign country entirely alone.
After 2 weeks of an emotional roller coaster , he has decided he wants to come back with the agreement he will be going to therapy for his mental health and we will only stay in the new country for about another 6 months.
Before he booked a flight back, I ended the relationship because I felt angry that we came here together and then he just abandoned me here.
Now I’m unsure if I made the right choice or if I am being unreasonable. All advice welcome.
TL;DR: my boyfriend and I moved to a new country together. He struggled with the move and got a flight home by himself, leaving me alone for for weeks. He wants to come back but I ended it. Not sure if I made a mistake.
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