TL;DR; Am I overreacting or should he respect my boundaries?
Context: Last month my boyfriend and I broke up, because I accidentally found his Reddit open and saw a number of posts he had written about me on various forums. (Just to note, I had to download Reddit to post this because I’ve never used the app before and didn’t really understand it.) The posts were quite hurtful and related to me putting on weight and losing my hair. Last year I had a big health scare, lost my hair and put on weight from the steroids, I went from a UK 8 to UK12. Something which he said never mattered and he still loved me to my face, but said I was unattractive online which broke my heart really. What hurt more was that he over exaggerated the reality of the situation online and made me feel worse. He had also written some pretty wild posts about his ex flings from before we were together. I’m an ignorance is bliss kind of person, so I never wanted to find or read these things about myself or go hunting for issues.
We broke up, he begged for us to reconcile, I was really really apprehensive at first because my confidence and self image were destroyed, but he never betrayed my trust before, he was a good boyfriend, he told me it was hard watching me go through everything and that what he did was a massive mistake and that was difficult to see me change even if it wasn’t my fault. I decided to give him a second chance and start again and work on things with open communication about issues. My one stipulation was Reddit, I asked him if he could delete the app until I could trust him again because I didn’t really understand it and I felt like I didn’t know the person he was reading his old posts. He agreed, deleted it in front of me and that was the end of it, so I thought.
Cut to last night, we were going to sleep, I usually sleep with my eye mask on. He asked me why I hadn’t put it on yet, which I thought was strange. I put it on half over my eyes and pretended to be asleep, I could see him on Reddit again! I haven’t confronted him yet, but it really bothers me. More that he is acting shady about it and trying to hide it from me, and with previous issues I’m weary of his intentions. Since he doesn’t want to communicate with me, I thought I would use his method!
TL;RL; Am I overreacting or should he respect my boundaries?
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