We have been dating a year or so and this relationship confuses me. On the one hand we have good physical chemistry and our emotional chemistry is decent but requires quite a bit of effort and work. Our world views are quite different sometimes and I'm not sure how well he gets me.
I love to spoil the person I'm with and I'm a hopeless romantic. In the beginning he would try and spoil me too and it just fizzled out in a couple of months once he "had" me. I hate that this happened and I know that that's how a lot of relationships go. But I disagree that this is how it should be. I know that on my part I put in a lot of effort into dates and little surprises and doing sweet things for him and it feels like he does not reciprocate. He would rather take a passive role on that front in our relationship.
I realize that communication is important here but a part of me dies when I have to ask to be made to feel special to him. I feel like in a relationship we should want to and make a consistent effort to make the other person feel good. I don't think that's something he thinks about or actively works on at all.
It feels very transactional when I have to consistently reiterate and remind him what I want. I wish he would take more of an effort to remember.
What should I do and where do I go from here? Is it ridiculous for me to expect more?
TL;DR : I feel a little neglected by my partner and wish he would spend a little more time on making an effort to spoil/ treat me with gifts/ dates/ surprises and sweet gestures. I hate having to ask repeatedly.
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