I broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years, 8 months ago and i've been thinking weekly, if not daily to end things. I really dont find joy anymore in anything, my favourite part of the day is when i sleep and i dont feel anything anymore. I cant stop blaming myself for everything I did wrong in the relationship, for being ungrateful, unexperienced while my ex is happy with someone else.
I just cant take it anymore. I cant forget the life i had before with my ex and i keep telling myself maybe if i would have been more patience, more understanding, less spoiled. I know it has more to do with myself, because im not happy with my life, but i dont think i ll ever come to he level of happiness i achieved with my ex, before starting to fight w him. He was my first boyfriend, and he was everything i wanted at first, i really thought he was a gift from God and i was so happy i found someone with whom i could be happy and who would take care of me, unlike my parent's relationship.
Im tired of living with this weight on my chest, im crying everyday and its exhausting for me and those around me.
Tl;dr: I (25F) think about endings things everyday after i broke up with my bf (35M)
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