About us

Saturday, June 17, 2023

What can I (30m) do to navigate a hostile situation between me and my step-dad (57m)

So I'm (30m) in a bit of a pickle here. So I currently live in a house that I found that I rent from my parents (47 f and 56 m) (because I didn't make as much money back then as I do now) and I went from paying the land contract to paying a discounted rate and then getting my rent raised twice (contrary to my folks telling me that I would only need to pay them 250/month and giving me the house after two years. My rent got raised to cover a mortgage that they have on another property (which I was covering while it was cheaper when my remt was 250 and no one knew for two years.)

Then I met my gf (now newly fiance) and my dad said he'd sell me the house for less than he bought it for if we got married. Then he thought this place would be too small for us both and I'm like fine I'll just find my own because I'm tired of being jerked around. All this has been over the span of nearly 3 years. Fast forward to today and my mom spotted her dream house (which can house the whole family including my grana who's sleeping in the family room) and her income can cover it but her credit isn't the best and dad couldn't do it because of his job being part time. So me and mom came up with a deal. I help her get the house and her and dad can just give me the house like originally intended and I don't have to pay any rent anymore starting in the fall.

Now at this point I was hesitant because I'm not a fan of cosigning personally and things have changed up too much with dad so I wrote up an agreement to keep it honest. Then last night my dad decided to alter the deal by my paying rent until the end of next year until his job is good and his credit is clear. Now I'm kinda pissed and I leave and I get calls from both of them. Mom was going to cancel the loan request and was kinda mad at dad for taking the wind out of things amd dad called me basically telling me to help her get her house because that's my mother and to stop being disrespectful. I laughed at that because during the last 10 years I have done everything they ever asked for and then some from helping put together their church (with a lot of time, effort and some of my own money), I've helped them get their rentals through my connections, helped them by going to bat for them for the real estate loan that got them their new roof and dad's classic car and a few other things as well as one of the rentals. I have given my mom my truck to help her get to work when her car was down and went into debt to buy my current car that I paid off very quickl. I told them to take care of it and I end up having to pay for the repairs when it broke down twice without their help (even though mom did give me half of the repair bill money which was nice because dad wasn't ) and a lot of other stuff.

I guess at the end of the day I know mom is looking to help me out by giving me the house and I feel like dad is jerking me around and it's causing me to really not want to respect him because over the last several years he's cheated on my mom, lied about several situations, started getting a little more vulgar in how he talks, getting really aggressive with everyone verbally, started smoking and even smoked in my car knowing I'm not a smoker and didn't even offer to help me detail it and clean it when I finally towed the thing home.

I feel like I want to help my mom because she's doing her best to look out for me (and I'm a mommas boy as my biological dad was never really there until my step dad came into the picture ) but I don't want this to bite me in the ass given how dad likes to mess stuff up. I don't want my kindness being taken advantage of. I feel like that could happen and could possibly impact my credit that I worked so hard to build. I want to help my mom but I really don't trust my step dad. I don't know what to do anymore at this point. Should I go through with this agreement or should I just say bump it and just move later and abandon this house that was supposed to be given to me?

Tl;dr my mom and I came up with a deal to give me a house I've been renting from her and dad and my dad is being an ass and altering the deal and I'm worried this will come back to bite me because of previous instances with him.

submitted by /u/Brogomakishima
[link] [comments]

* This article was originally published here

No comments:

Post a Comment