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Wednesday, January 10, 2024

Should I (24F) be paying more rent than my boyfriend(26M)?

I (F24) live with my boyfriend (M25) of 4 years in large city. We moved in together 1 year ago after I had recently gotten a very good new job, that increased my income. We currently pay $730 per week rent, which has been split $400 (me), $330 (my boyfriend).

For context I have been on $180k for the last year, an increase from my job for the year prior to that where I was on $65k Whilst my boyfriend has been on c.$80k.

Whilst I make a large amount more than my boyfriend, he has significantly more savings than me. I have $100k, saved up mostly from my last year working. My boyfriend has $190k, saved up from working, and also a significant recent investment payoff of c.$80k which his parents helped him with.

He believes that he “makes no money” and it is good to “have a security blanket” and I should continue to pay more rent. I am happy to pay a bit more, as I have done over the past year, however I don’t think it’s exactly fair to keep paying more given overall he has a large amount more money than me.

It is probably important to note too that I grew up in a lower income household and don’t have anyone else to rely upon for money except myself. I think I have a pretty good grasp of the value of money, I am very greatfull to have such a high paying job at a young age. My goal is to save as much money as I can whilst in this job for a house deposit to help set myself up for the future. Especially as my current job is very high intensity and I likely won’t stay in this job long term.

Whilst my boyfriend has come from a wealthy family who have supported him financially all his life (eg. providing investments, paying for his university degree) and still continue to give him c. $200 a week to help support him given he “makes no money”. He has a security blanket and can always fall back on them. I am understanding and happy he is able to get that kind of support from his parents although it frustrates me when he refers to himself as not doing well financially and me doing well.

Lastly, he is working in a job that provides very good exit opportunities and if he wanted could get another job likely around $150k. However, is currently pursuing athletics alongside his job and given the time commitment doesn’t want to leave his relatively flexible job.

Am I in the wrong for feeling this way? How should we be splitting the rent?

TLDR: I make more than my boyfriend but he is more wealthy, should I be paying more rent?

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* This article was originally published here

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