Tldr: I was wondering whether I should try and push my girlfriend to decide whether to chose between me or her guy bestfriend and was wondering what would you do?
My girlfriend(20f) and I (21m) have been dating for about 4 months now.
Hi all here to ask for some other insight into my current troubles with my girlfriend of 4 months. There has been a guy friend who has honestly completely messed with my head and before you call me insecure or controlling please hear me out. So this guy who I’ll call B has been a good friend of my girlfriend from before we met and I’ve never had good feelings about B I’ve seen there previous chat logs and it’s all abdomen pictures and my girlfriend had also sent provocative photos in return (mind you this was all before I knew her) when I asked about these photos and what there relationship is like and whether I should be worried she shrugs it off tells me they had a “moment” one night and realised they didn’t find eachother attractive and didn’t do it again. Fast forward a week after that conversation my girlfriend and I had a small argument like couples do and she went to him for support, she told me what he said about the argument and what he thought about it to which I blew up and told her she shouldn’t be going to other guys about our problems to which she agreed and to my knowledge hasn’t done it since. Then I kid you not, not even a day later he “accidentally” sends my girlfriend a provocative photo to which I don’t find out about till about 1-2 weeks later. Obviously I was quite upset I wasn’t told and when I asked why I wasn’t told she said because she thought I was going to tell her to block him. To be fair as much as I’d like to say block him I can’t, I do not control her and it is entirely her decision she can decide what to do judging by my reaction to the situation and how it benefits our relationship. This was quite early in the relationship and during our relationship up till now I’ve definitely brought up concerns where I see her not giving me attention at all or shrugging my efforts to text him and her responses to me bringing up my concerns is usually met with silence, anger toward me while she completely defends him and claims he was there throughout all of her struggles. Fast forward to today I thought to myself while she was asleep whether the provocative photos I saw way early on were still there which led me to do something I hadn’t don’t before which was go on her phone and check there chat. I found every single photo they had sent before our relationship including the provocative ones. And what I found was there was so many more than I remember spanning from when they first started texting up till a couple weeks before I started dating my now girlfriend. Which has made me question whether it was “just a one night thing” and this is where my problem arises how do I bring this up to talk about with her and what my next move is. Thanks for reading desperately need another opinion on this.
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