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Wednesday, July 24, 2024

ME 40M years and my wife 39F years married happily together for 15 years. Could advice me how i can go through this situation? i felt like i am cheated

One of my wife's work collogue has one sided emotional infatuation with my wife. my wife rejected him and blocked him completely. then we got married. after 3 years this person got married to our distinct relative. My wife told everything about this person and stopped the contact altogether until his marriage. This Person contacted my wife through my wife's first cousin to let her know he is married now happily, My wife's cousin and this person are close friends. i permitted her to talk with boundaries as they are relative to us. They do only friendly talks in conference calls weekly once or twice for two months. they had a wats app group. then my wife slowly stopped talking with him altogether. Later i came to know that this person calls everyone with endearment terms like honey, dear etc.. i asked my wife how he used to address you. she said mostly name and sometimes honey. She use to update me about their calls and show messages. but she did not tell this particular word he used. she is saying it seems trivial for her, that person called everyone that way even in workplace not specifically to me. it is harmless/ meaningless to her. That to during the calls he address just once with honey, mostly he address by her name. i sued to addressed him by his name not used any endearment terms not even once. i was looking at the overall situation not the trivial things. what can i do now, i stopped contacting him altogether. whatever you want me to do now i can do, i cant change the past. I am not able to get over this i fell like i got cheated. what you guys think. i expected from my wife to say don't use these kinds of words with me , it should be used only by my husband.

She saying she spoke to him as he got married so he moved on his life. he married to our relative so there may be situation we have to meet each other. so for the basic human courtesy i talked with him with your permission. He did not do any personal messages except his birthday wishes which i told to you.

he made three or four personal calls. i talked only for 1/2 min. as he is trying to make more personal calls i cutoff the contact completely

I ponder like if third person hear this conversation why they will think about my wife. he is cheating on me right

TL;DR! is this the instance of cheating? how to bounce back from this

submitted by /u/Particular-Grab818
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