So my girlfriend [22] and I [24] have been dating for a couple of months now. Shortly into us dating she found out her grandmother was very unwell and she recently passed away. When she found out the date of the funeral I had plans on the day before (when she would travel back home) and work the next day so it seemed unlikely I could go, not to mention I’ve hardly met her family so didn’t feel it was my place to go. I offered to her that I could cancel my plans but she said not to worry. The night before she was leaving to go back home she begins arguing with me that I haven’t been supportive enough and that I should’ve pushed more to come and support her at the funeral, straight away I offer to cancel everything and come with her. After a few hours of back and forth of her telling me she doesn’t want me there she finally gives in and let’s me come with her. We travel up and everything is fine the day before, then on the day of the funeral I’m there to support her every step of the way, it was a hard day for her family but I did what I could to help. On the train home she is in an awful mood with me and goes on to say that I wasn’t supportive enough on the journey to the funeral, apparently even her brother asked why I wasn’t comforting her in the car. I felt that if she needed me she would ask me and I’d been holding my hand out for her but she didn’t take it. In the church I didn’t comfort her as were gay and I feel uncomfortable being openly affectionate around people I don’t know, especially if they’re religious. I feel awful knowing that I’ve made her day harder for her in anyway and that I haven’t been supportive enough. I suffer from panic disorders/health anxiety so I often get into my own head, especially at something like a funeral but it wasn’t an excuse to not be more supportive. Any advice for how I can make it up to her? Or whether she’s asking too much of me?
TL;DR - my girlfriend thinks I wasn’t supportive enough at her relatives funeral because I didn’t ask if she was okay or hold her on the journey
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