TL;DR: My boyfriend and I recently started playing a game with his friend and his girlfriend and it feels like my boyfriend is prioritizing her fun over mine.
Hi all, this post is mostly just me venting into the void that is reddit. I know that the feelings I’m having are irrational and I don’t have anyone to talk them over with. I don’t feel it’d be appropriate to talk them over with my boyfriend because in reality, he didn’t do anything wrong. No one did. My brain is just screaming at me to over analyze and to be angry.
For context my boyfriend and I have been together for almost two years and we’ve been living together for about a year, about to move into another apartment together. I’ve always had jealousy issues, it’s something I’m deeply ashamed of but that I cannot seem to get rid of. I will just ruminate and ruminate until I blow up over something incredibly minor. And I know, that is in no way healthy for either of us.
My boyfriend ( George ) and I recently started playing a game together with my boyfriend’s friend ( Sage ) and his girlfriend ( Lola ). My boyfriend and I have been playing this game for a while before Sage and Lola joined our group, we’re honestly kind of both sweats when playing but we made it into a routine where we’d both play together every night and it’s been a lot of fun.
Just a few days ago Sage asked to join our team and Lola tagged along. Of course we said yes because we’ve been wanting to have a four man team for a while and it’d be lots of fun. Well since they started playing with us, I honestly haven’t had any fun. This is because my boyfriend has been fixating on making sure Lola is having fun. We’ve played close to 20 games together and I survived maybe 2 of them. I was constantly dying at the beginning of the game, and it became pretty clear that it was due to Lola’s mistakes.
For more context, the game is called Dead by Daylight and consists of 4 survivors having to escape a killer. Lola was constantly alerting the killer to her location when I was near, saying that she was in chase with the killer when I was, and bringing the killer to me when I was hidden. But while I’m dead or dying on the hook, my boyfriends constantly telling Lola where the killer is so she isn’t found, healing her immediately, taking hits and chases over for her and just overall making sure that Lola always survived. Overall he was choosing to help Lola, even in situations when she didn’t need any help, over me.
This combined with the fact that he wasn’t talking to me and when I would talk, he wasn’t listening. Like straight up, was not listening to anything I said. I know he wasn’t because I called out multiple things I noticed about a particular killer ( perks, add-ons ) and then when we got to the end game chat ( where it shows you all of the killers perks and add-ons ) he started listing them and started talking about how he didn’t know he had any of those perks or add-ons and how it would have been useful to know.
She also was dying laughing at everything my boyfriend would say. I swear to god my boyfriend said “Beep beep boop” and this girl was lmaoing in real life. It got to the point where Sage even made a joke that my boyfriend was trying to steal his girl. And my boyfriend didn’t deny it, he just said something along the lines of “you should try to be funnier sometime.”
So something that used to be my bonding time with my boyfriend is now something I barley get to enjoy. Aside from the jealousy, it’s not fun to play a game where I’m always dead at the start. Anyways, I know none of this really matters but I just needed to talk it out. If you read all of this thank you, it means a lot just to be listened to for a minute.
Names have been changed to protect privacy.
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