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Friday, August 23, 2024

29M Need Advice

My (29m) girlfriend (26f) confessed that she drunkenly sent a photo to her ex boyfriend several months ago while out with friends. The photo is of a pet they shared together and her ex. He responded the next morning just being friendly but not flirtatious and that was the end of the interaction. He did reach out a few weeks after she had texted him but she did not respond. She told me about him reaching out when it happened and did not respond. Before this, he reached out several times and she was always very honest about the communication which she either did not respond to, or responded in a respectful but faithful manner that let him know the door was closed. I feel very confident she is not hiding anything else.

She has apologized profusely and I can tell she feels very bad about this. She said as soon as she sent the text she felt regret and did not know why she had done it. We have since moved in together. I am really struggling with what to do or how to move forward

On the one hand I am glad she fessed up and feel confident she came clean to me about the interaction in its entirety. She came clean about two other very small things that I did not know about that were really not of any significance (she had used a nicotine vape a few times without my knowledge (I would not care) and something else similar and very minor). She confessed this all to me at once to clear her conscience and because she claims she is committed to not hiding anything from me moving forward and those were all the things she had withheld from me. She told me she is committed to being honest with me and recognizes her dishonest behavior as a problem that she needs to address. On the other hand, she withheld hurtful information from me that I did not know which stripped me of the ability to be able to make the decision to move in together knowing everything fully.

We have been together around a year and a half. We get along extremely well and are very likeminded individuals. Living together has so far been amazing and we are very compatible. I have been thinking about a future with her and until this I felt incredibly confident we would spend our lives together. Don’t want to tell my parents or friends because I don’t want them to judge her if we decide to work through this so that is why I am here on Reddit to get some advice. Appreciate your advice! What do you all think?

TLDR girlfriend texted ex. Didn’t tell me about it before we moved in together. Unsure of what to do now.

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* This article was originally published here

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