Hi, this is my first ever Reddit post, so please bear with me. I am just looking for an outside look to see what others think, sorry if it’s all over the place, but I’m just trying to summarise everything that happened.
I was talking with this girl (f20), and I am (m20), and we instantly clicked, and our personalities and views matched. The only thing is that she came out of two toxic relationships, the most recent one being two months ago. She likes to go out, and I'm more of a stay-at-home person, but I even went out of my way to go out to places I’ve never been to make her happy because I thought I had a future with her and wanted to see her happy and try change for her.
She told me I brought out her "inner child" and she felt so happy with me and how I treated her, she felt so "loved", I never yelled at her, put her down, or did anything of the sort that I think she experienced in her last relationships.
To start things off, we didn’t have any issues at the start; we were peaceful and civil, and we established our dos and don’ts and how we both view relationships, we both agreed communication was the most important thing, and we stuck to it.
Firstly on of the main issue is that she kissed her best friend at her party (f) and hid it from me because she was scared of how I’d react, and I acted like it was fine when it wasn’t because I really did love her, saw a future with her, and was willing to put it aside and forgive her.
Secondly, she wouldn’t listen to me to remove guys off her social media (snap) who were trying to get her to come over and obviously do things with her(apparently she had a phase). She eventually did, but it took a bit for her to even acknowledge and see what I was talking about. I’m not sure if they ever did things, but the things they were asking for pointed towards it.
I then told her I didn’t want her to go clubbing because 90% of times people go clubbing for a quick hookup with no strings attached, and she was going with all her single friends. She’s not going to sit there while they are hooking up and talking to guys. She even agreed to the points I was making. We then talked about it, and we came to the conclusion that it was fine because I really did trust her (I didn't want to go because the nightlife isn't for me and I don't drink, which I did say before we started getting deeper into our relationship).
Now coming to Sunday, we had an argument that I thought we could resolve, but nope, she didn’t even want to call me to try sorting it out, she just said she was feeling tied down and didn’t want to even talk to me anymore or want to continue building a relationship with me. She also said she met my family too fast when she wanted to come over, and I even told her they would be here, and she said it was okay and she even wanted to add my sister on snap.
I just feel like I was used for comfort and fed lies to keep me from losing interest. I had to always hear about everything her exs did, and she would always mention them no matter what even if we where having a moment to ourselves. I just feel so used and dumb for falling for it because I really did like her.
If anyone reads this or responds I’ll try my best to reply to any questions. TL;DR we stoped talking over a petty argument and now looking back at everything I feel used to help her fill in the “partner” role
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* This article was originally published here
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